How to Win Friends and Influence People: Social Skills

Breni's social skills path turns three well-known books into skills you practise. There are 3 courses: How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie, Crucial Conversations, and Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss. It moves from everyday rapport, to conversations where stakes are high, to formal negotiation. Learners practise appreciation, listening, making it safe to talk, labelling feelings and asking calibrated questions, with short scenarios after each idea.

  • 3 courses
  • 36 learning objectives
  • Level: beginner
  • Language: English
  • Price: Subscription, free trial

What you will be able to do

  • Use Carnegie's principles to start and keep rapport
  • Spot silence and violence in a tense conversation
  • Restore safety before returning to the topic
  • Mirror and label to show you have understood
  • Ask calibrated how and what questions in a negotiation

Full curriculum

Part 1 · Everyday rapport

1. How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie: Make People Like You

Use Carnegie's principles to build rapport and change minds without resentment. Units, in order: Do not criticise, condemn or complain; Give honest, sincere appreciation; Become genuinely interested in other people; Remember names and be a good listener; Win people to your way of thinking; Change people without giving offence.

  • — Avoid Harsh Criticism
    Stop complaining and give honest appreciation.
    • Stop Criticizing People
    • Give Honest Appreciation
    • Arouse Eager Want
  • — Show Genuine Interest
    Become genuinely interested in other people.
    • Be Genuinely Interested
    • Smile More Often
    • Talk Their Interests
  • — Names and Listening
    Remember names and be a good listener.
    • Remember Names
    • Be a Good Listener
    • Make People Feel Important
  • — Win People Over
    Learn how to win people to your thinking.
    • Avoid Arguments
    • Respect Opinions
    • Admit Mistakes
  • — Smart Persuasion Methods
    Use friendly steps to persuade others.
    • Begin in Friendly Way
    • See Their Viewpoint
    • Dramatize Your Ideas
  • — Change Without Offense
    Change people without giving offense or resentment.
    • Praise and Appreciation
    • Call Out Mistakes Indirectly
    • Ask Instead of Order

Part 2 · Hard talks and negotiation

2. Crucial Conversations by Patterson, Grenny, McMillan and Switzler: Talk When Stakes Are High

Keep a high-stakes conversation honest and safe. Units, in order: What makes a conversation crucial; The false choice between honesty and the relationship; The pool of shared meaning; Silence and violence as signs of fear; Making it safe to talk; Mastering the story you tell yourself.

  • — Crucial Conversations Basics
    Learn what defines a high-stakes conversation.
    • High stakes and strong emotions
  • — The Fool's Choice
    Avoid choosing between honesty and relationship.
    • Silence or honesty choice
  • — Shared Meaning Pool
    Build a common pool of meaning together.
    • Fill the pool
  • — Silence and Violence
    Understand how stress causes defensive reactions.
    • Stress changes behavior
  • — Creating Safety
    Establish psychological safety in conversations.
    • Mutual purpose and respect
  • — Mastering Your Story
    Take control of the stories you tell.
    • Victim villain and helpless stories

3. Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss: Negotiate With Tactical Empathy

Use a hostage negotiator's tools in everyday negotiations. Units, in order: Tactical empathy; Mirroring the other side's words; Labelling feelings out loud; Calibrated how and what questions; Getting to "that's right"; Black swans: the facts that change a deal.

  • — Tactical Empathy and Mindset
    Understand counterpart perspective and form hypotheses.
    • Tactical Empathy
    • Hypothesis Formation
  • — Mirrors and Dynamic Silence
    Repeat words and use silence effectively.
    • Using Mirrors
    • Dynamic Silence
  • — Labelling Feelings Out Loud
    Bring forth unexpressed emotions using labels.
    • Understanding Labels
    • Affect Shifts and Labels
  • — Calibrated Questions
    Ask what and how questions to guide thinking.
    • Calibrated Questions
    • No-Oriented Questions
  • — Reaching That is Right
    Summarize facts and sentiments to get agreement.
    • Making a Summary
    • Accusation Audit
  • — Black Swans and Tactics Symphony
    Combine negotiation tactics and find black swans.
    • Proof of Life Labels
    • Negotiation Symphony

Sample: How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie: Make People Like You

The opening tier, (Avoid Harsh Criticism). Stop complaining and give honest appreciation.

Stop Criticizing People

Do not criticize, condemn, or complain.

Give Honest Appreciation

Give honest and sincere appreciation.

Arouse Eager Want

Arouse in the other person an eager want.

Questions about How to Win Friends and Influence People: Social Skills

What are Dale Carnegie's main principles?

They include not criticising, giving honest appreciation, becoming genuinely interested in others and letting the other person feel the idea is theirs. The Breni course practises them one at a time.

Is How to Win Friends and Influence People still relevant?

Its advice on listening and appreciation is still widely taught, though some examples are dated. The course pairs it with two newer books on hard conversations and negotiation.

Do I need to read the books first?

No. Each course explains the book's ideas in plain language and links to the sources it was built from.

Is Breni affiliated with the authors?

No. Breni is not affiliated with the authors, their companies or their publishers.

Do I get a certificate?

Yes, finishing all 3 courses earns a Breni certificate of completion.

Related learning paths

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